Kids these days.

[21:36] itsrainingwords: i've gotten really good at taking care of myself, rio.
[21:37] starox18: yeah.
[21:38] itsrainingwords: and i'm so used to it..... it doesn't phase me.
[21:38] starox18: it should
[21:38] starox18: everything should
[21:38] starox18: you are young
[21:38] starox18: and you won't always be
[21:38] itsrainingwords: yeah, i'm young.
[21:39] itsrainingwords: but i'm the kind of young that had to/has to be able to be not-so-young. but i'm not so old that i don't appreciate my youth.
[21:40] itsrainingwords: like i told you, i just think about that night in august running around completely naked with a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other.... and i know that will never be as special as it was.... because i'll never be young enough to appreciate it like that again.
[21:41] starox18: no, you're cynical and you make me want to forcefeed you the little mermaid and twilight and fortune cookies until you think cigarettes are icky and fucked up people aren't really real and sex is something that happens with tru wuv vampire abortion style and you're never going to be that person because you never were
[21:41] starox18: and beer is usually untasty
[21:42] starox18: but cigarettes aren't, and you already know that, and it makes me sad for every child who will never be a child
[21:42] itsrainingwords: believe it or not, there was a time when i was innocent, when i was a kid. it just didn't last as long as it could/should/might have.
[21:42] starox18: and everyone has to grow up sometime but it's not usually over one year
[21:42] starox18: or one month
[21:43] starox18: or one godawful winter where the sun sets at 4 and rises at 8 and it's always dark and you're always miserable
[21:43] starox18: and you come home to realize everyone your own age is twenty years younger
[21:43] starox18: and everything happens all at once
[21:43] starox18: and you fucked up so badly
[21:43] starox18: and you'll never get it back again
[21:44] starox18: and now you're paying for it and you didn't even do that much wrong but no one gives a shit
[21:44] starox18: and everyone is not seeing
[21:44] starox18: and not caring
[21:45] starox18: and you realize that you're fucked up, you're a psa, a pamphlet, a paragraph in a psyche book
[21:45] starox18: and you can't do anything about it
[21:45] starox18: you're fucked up
[21:45] itsrainingwords: way to make me feel like something that isn't a person.
[21:46] starox18: i'm sorry
[21:46] starox18: i'm not really talking to you anymore
[21:46] itsrainingwords: who are you talking to?
[21:49] starox18: it's not really not caring if nobody knows
[21:50] starox18: myself
[21:50] itsrainingwords: i kind of got that feeling.
[21:50] itsrainingwords: but it all still hurts.